Sunday, July 30, 2006
rastafarian rendezvous: the night as i remember it
it has been a while since i went out...being a "bum" doesn't really pay well. so yes, you can say i was looking forward to to our "rasta night". and seeing my fellow trainees in normal clothes is something i've been looking forward to. can you imagine us with no sweat pants, no knee support, no running shoes? aaaah..it was definitely something. upon arriving at the party, i was greeted with comments such as "pinaghandaan talga". but really, those were my normal clothes. except for the "reggae inspired" beannie, i was pretty much wearing the same clothes that i normally wear when i'm out (not on a night out maybe). anyways, we arrived there with only but a few trainees and a couple of members. i was eager for the party to get started knowing for a fact that before the clock even strikes midnight my mom will already be on the phone nagging us "to get our butts home". but there being pretty much nothing else to do, camera flashes were everywhere. i guess everyone was grabbing the opprtunity to look humanely decent for the next batch of uploaded pics. at around 10, there were still but a few guests to officially start the party so i decided to eat and grab a can of san mig light. i knew i can handle three before i get "tipsy", and i thought i would be sent home before i even reach the third one. well..that was before i met this guy "Arlene". i had just finish my first can when he handed me a glass of what i thought was JUST BEER. well i was wrong...after that glass, things were pretty much a blur. and when i get started i don't know when to stop. i was cornered by him a couple more times...and well these were the following events that i'd much sooner forget but i don't think my fellow trainees will let me (particularly Aries):
- i invaded people's personal space. i was hugging anyone in sight. but just the girls. there was Jhoana, Angie, Nette, May...im not really sure if there are others. i think Genie too.
- i was "woohoo-ing" to everything.
- i joined Batch 2k3 for their picture. apparently after the words "batch 2003" was shouted, i jumped out from nowhere. i almost forgot this if not for Aries reminding me yesterday.
- i let it slipped. a secret only three people knew. now some bald guy knows.
- again, i let it slipped. a code name only a few knew. now the very person who owns the code name, knows. shit. i remember this quite accurately. i remember my head telling me to "sshhhh" but my mouth was out of control.
- i was saying "hi" to everyone. let it be known, i am not a friendly person when i'm sober.
- i was annoyingly noisy.
- i was pulling people to get their pictures taken with their crush.
- i was speaking VERY BAD ENGLISH at some point.
- i was begging Sir Bojo to adopt me for TC2.
- i shrieked. a lot.
- i called TB, chismoso.
- i was doing roll call. a stupid thing i apparently do when i've had a couple of drinks.
- a lot of other stupid things.
so there u go. i made a fool out of myself yet again. i guess i won't be drinking for a loOoOoOng time...hopefully. but let me just say this again "I wasn't DRUNK". haha..
my pics9:59 PM
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just to let it out
one cannot force oneself to write. so lemme just say i did it. I DID IT! I really freakin' DID IT! will elaborate on this entry tomorow. my knees are killing me at the moment. i need to sleep. but i still can't believe that i could do it pala. thanks to all the encouragement..and a lot of help from these people: aries. may. paulo. achi. bajay. yey!!!!!! *jumps around* yey! yey! yey!
8:18 AM
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Saturday, July 29, 2006
the wall
they say "a picture can paint a thousand words"... only but a few were painted on my mind. "you are sending yourself to an early grave". "what the heck are you getting yourself into." "OH.MY.GOD." and "hmm..alman always has kick-ass pictures."a few more hours and i'll be the one dangling on those ropes... as much as i'd rather stay home and sleep the day away, i was already warned by some AMCI members to better show up. some even referred to it as the "best training day". reeeaaally now...
last sunday alone was a HUGE challenge for me. thoughts much similar to those stated above were swirling on my head... it was only one floor high but to me it looked like a hundred story building, it was my Everest. i fought so hard not to let my fear get in the way, but honestly after hearing terror stories from the lecturer who could blame me? after an overwhelming coaxing from fellow trainees and members, i forced myself to go up there and be done with it. lemme just say everything went blank when i was up there. i could hear them but their words were like those of a buzzing bee. i was ON MY OWN. it was just me, the rope and the wall. i wanted to cry again, but i couldn't..literally. every step was an achievement and an obstacle. each step was bringing me closer to the top, but each step was also leading me higher and higher. the words "Don't look down" are not applicable, how the hell am i suppose to know where to land my foot next. but i did it. i reached the top... yet again, that was not the end of it. i had to come down too right? and this was not a simpler taskin any way. this was an actual execution of my fear, this is where my fear lies...the falling down. i hang on to the rope with every might. i could never describe the feeling i got when my feet finally landed on the cushion. i wanted to jump. i wanted to laugh. i wanted to hug anyone (preferably "you-know-who). i wanted to cry. but then again, maybe my huge smile said it all.
though i am proud of the fact that i was able to climb that wall..TWICE. i'd much sooner forget that i also bawled like a baby in front of all those people, not to mention a "crushie" (i sound like a high school giddy girl don't i?).
but i guess i got no one but myself to blame. i was the one who signed up for this, might as well go ahead with it. as i've said before, one damn training day at a time. wish me luck!
12:13 AM
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